Here are some things about teaching that I have learnt in the past two weeks...
There are many 'frequently used phrases'.
My one for last week was 'Abdul, CHAIR!' - used to get an 11 year old to use all four chair legs and not swing back and forth on it.
Parents don't consider the following when buying a birthday cake for their child to share with the class:
1) A square cake is easier to cut than a round one.
2) It is difficult to cut 30 slices from a cake intended for 20 people.
3) Chocolate Cake with butter icing goes everywhere.
4) Teachers and T.A.'s time is better spent teaching than cutting up cake. Individual cakes are a far better option.
Photocopiers are essential...and generally unreliable.
Biff, Chip and Kipper are very stupid names.
The child who tells you he didn't do his homework with his best friend but they happen to get the same (incorrect) answers and (wrong) spellings is probably lying.
Children always have something funny to say:
10 year old: 'What's that game the Victorians used to play?
10 year old thinks and looks through text book.
10 year old: 'I remember...Gobsmacker!' - pointing to a picture of hopscotch!
There is never a dull moment at school!